The 50 Best Movies Of 2014

Some film get rammed down your throat by an advertising campaign as subtle as an Alan Carr audiobook. Some however you find almost by accident. But how can you possibly have the time to weed out the 5 star classics from the chaff? Well dear reader that's where I come in. Having zero social life and hating almost everything that is shown on the telly has given me the perfect opportunity to watch around 120 of the last 12 months big releases. So here I present to my 50 best movies of 2014 for you to peruse and pick out the ones you feel you should check out.

As always there were a few rules in order for a films to qualify for the list

• No documentaries - movies only, simply for the fact that it would double the size of the list
• The film must have been released in the UK this year. This means that many of the movies that won Oscars way back at the start of the year and came out in the states in 2013 get on this years list
• Again I haven't seen everything but cannot publish this list on December31st as I will be too drunk to see so again sorry Hobbit fans but The Battle Of The 5 Armies will not feature here; but I'm sure it won't kill that movies chances at the box office. Also Birdman and Inherent Vice are going to have to slip into next years list. Apologies to Michael Keaton
• I've tried to be as objective as possible; meaning that any movie by The Coen brothers does not automatically get top spot just for being made by my personal heros. Similarly don't kick off at me just because I haven't put Spiderman at #1 and YOU LOVE SPIDERMAN. 

And that's about it. Lets crack on shall we?

#50 The Inbetweeners Movie 2

You'll know already if your a fan of the clunge obsessed bus wankers by now but when the second Inbetweeners movie came out most of us were pleasantly surprised. In amongst the poo jokes and banging your mum comments was a surprisingly sweet movie about teenage friendships, love and not just a money grabbing cash cow. Also instantly recognisable for anyone who has had to put up with a gap yah student with white boy dreads telling them about their theories on the universe. Show writers Iain Morris and Damon Beesley step up to the job of directors with an ease of confidence. A fitting goodbye to the boys (please no more, Neil looks about 30 now)!

#49 Chef

Forget Masterchef, The Great British Bake Off and that one where the fat American eats all the burgers, last year Chef was the food porn of choice. John Favreau goes back to his indie routes after Iron Man and calls in all his Hollywood pals to make a charming little road movie about a chef getting back to his cooking routes. Fundamentally a heartwarming story about sticking it to the man, Chef boasts one of the best casts of the year and great kicking Mexican soundtrack. A must see for all food lovers even if it is slightly implausibe that Favreau cast Sophie Vergara as his wife

#48 Obvious Child

Jenny Slate is probably best known for her hilarious turn on Parks and Recreation as John-Ralphios sister Mona-Lisa but here she steps out on her own in a star making turn in this great comedy tackling not exactly the most obvious comedic topic; abortion. Much more than just this years Juno, Slate brings a warmth and subtlety to her characters predicament that few actresses could manage. Also contains possibly the sweetest fart joke you'll see this year

#47 The Hunger Games: Mockingjay Part One

Much like the 1st part of Harry Potters final film, Mockingjay Part One slightly suffers from having almost zero action and essentially being a 2 hour long setup for next years explosive finale. Still when your 2 hours of talking features Jennifer Lawrence suffering from PTSD and the late, great Phillip Seymour Hoffman in his final role then I'm all for it. Climaxing in one of the best jump scares I saw all year and having Game of Thrones Natalie Dormer as a badass movie director Mockingjay really steps up the political and propaganda undertones of the whole franchise. Oh and Elizabeth Banks Effy' is still the best thing in it.

#46 The Wind Rises

For his final movie Studio Ghibli head honcho Hayao Miyazaki chose a fitting subject for a man who has spent his entire career making films about flight and flying.  The Wind Rises tells the story of Jiro Horikoshi and the planes he designed for Japan during the second world war. An ultimately depressing film (think Grave Of The Fireflies more than Ponyo) it is still as beautiful as you'd expect from a Ghibli movie and is as much a heart-wrenching love story as it is a comment on how war affects us all. A fitting swansong for Miyazaki and a timely reminder of how much the legendary filmmaker will be missed.

#45 The Zero Theorem

The most 'Terry Gilliamesque' Terry Gilliam movie since Twelve Monkeys, The Zero Theorem saw Christoph Waltz star as a paranoid reclusive computer programmer trying to solve a code which would prove that all life is meaningless. What follows is 2 hours of existential, genius nonsense from the American Python as he introduces Tilda Swintons mad AI doctor, Matt Damons eccentric dressing boss and Melanie Thierry as a femme fatale half Waltzes age. Gilliams imagining of a dystopian future is as crazy as you would expect but it's the performances on show here that really sell the film.

#44 Paddington

After such disasters as the Postman Pat movie and Yogi Bear hopes were not high for a big screen outing featuring everyones favourite marmalade eating bear. Luckily though Paul King (The Mighty Boosh) delivered a childrens classic that can rival Pixars and Aardmans best efforts. Ben Whishaw (a late replacement for Colin Firth) is perfect casting for the voice of the titular bear and all of the human cast, Hugh Bonniville, Jim Broadbent and Sally Hawkins put in a real shift to sell the movie as one of the years funniest and heartwarming. Thanks to the efforts of Ukip and Britain First it also comes out at a time when a comment on a bear immigrant in the UK being accepted is very timely and almost satirical. Who knew a bear in a duffel coat could be so on the nose.

#43 A Walk Amongst The Tombstones

Liam Neeson as an alcoholic ex cop working as a private detective hunting down a couple of murderers; what's not to love? Based on a novel by Lawrence Block and costarring Downton Abbeys Dan Stevens (not for the last time on this list) this noir thriller was an unexpected surprise. Slower and more restrained than what you'd expect from a Neeson movie these days, the terribly named Matthew Scudder is a an ex cop over 10 years sober trying to help Stevens drug lord find the men who kidnapped and murdered his wife. Dark, twisted and violent; a private eye classic.

#42 American Hustle

So it shouldn't have been nominated for 50,000 Oscars and was stupidly hyped to the point where the backlash was inevitable; that didn't stop American Hustle being a smart, sophisticated and above all, funny crime caper with Christian Bale on delicious form as the fat, balding con-man and Jennifer Lawrence as his put upon wife. Amy Adams, Bradley Cooper, Jeremy Renner and a few cameos I won't spoil here all ensure that American Hustle was one of best acted capers of the year. See it for Bales comb-over alone

#41 Maps To The Stars
David Cronenburgs movie about a rich Hollywood family was largely ignored over here which is a shame as it boasts a career best turn from Julianne Moore as a washed up star and a great supporting cast including John Cusack and Robert Pattinson (in his 2nd film with Cronenburg). Witty, biting and more about the fragile nature of the human mind than Tinseltown cameos, the movie was possibly marketed as Cronenburgs version of Entourage; what lies beneath the surface however is something much darker.

#40 Starred Up

Jack O 'Connell was undoubtedly this years breakout star and the former Skins cast member was on top form here as a violent young convict upgraded from Juvy due to his psychopathic tendancies. Worth watching for the scene where O'Connell breaks off 2 table legs and covers himself in baby oil alone, the film was possibly the most violent this year but also portrayed a great father and son relationship with O'Connell and his dad Ben Mendolson (who proves again how he can make any movie 25% better just by being in it). The critics called it the new Scum. They weren't wrong.

To Be Continued...